We all know the classic sayings about Truth:
“The truth hurts”
“You can’t handle the truth”
“The truth will set you free”
But do we really want the truth, and is it really loving to tell the truth?
Often when we tell the truth, it gets labeled as: arrogant, mean, selfish, critical, over-analyzing, or overly sensitive.
We have likely all felt the pain of being labeled for telling the truth inside of us. But if we commit to these labels and believe them about ourselves, we will remain in hiding and never be fully known.
We will continue to fool ourselves and those around us.
What would it cost you to begin to tell the truth in your life?
To tell your spouse how he/she has hurt you. To stand up for something that no one else is speaking about at work. To tell your mom and dad that you only want them to stay for 3 days instead of 7. To tell a friend how scared you really are and how much you need them.
To show how much you really care about something.
Can you picture yourself telling the truth in one of these areas of life?
How could it set you free? How could it hurt you? Would you and others around you be able to handle it? What could you lose?
What could you gain?
When we tell the truth in our lives we open up the old wounds of labels that have kept us hidden, and we ALSO open ourselves up to living in a new skin of being completely accepted and loved in our own truth — which sets us and the people around us free.
This new skin is not safe, telling the truth is dangerous.
But the passage to living fully is always waiting behind the Door of Risk.
A mirror is the closest thing we have to the truth, and the more we can clear away the fog of the secrets and lies, the more we can reflect back to ourselves and each other the truest reflection of what is.
This process requires a willingness to feel deep pain and embarrassment for something that matters more than the pain.
We must care deeply enough to deal with the discomfort.
We have to become the friends willing to tell the other when they have something in between their teeth, even if it embarrasses them.
The truth opens our eyes to what’s real, invites us to play a part in the acceptance of what is and what is not, and sets us free to be our truest selves.
If you’re interested guidance on how to better tell the truth in your own life, we’d love to help. Browse our therapists at Sage Hill Counseling to find the right guide for you: Nashville, Brentwood, Murfreesboro, Memphis.
Kate Hughes is a therapist at Sage Hill Counseling in Nashville, TN. She was led to Sage Hill through her own personal story of recovery and interned for a year and a half while earning her Masters in Counseling at Trevecca Nazarene University.