At times our culture seems to glamorize and idolize romance and marriage. Meanwhile this beautiful narrative of singlehood can get overlooked. I believe these years are full of meaning and purpose. I’ve compiled six truths about singleness that help us better live that out, whether for a season or a lifetime.
Singleness is hard. Singleness brings two battles: uncertainty and loneliness. Non-singles, be aware of these common struggles of your single friends and make space for community with them. And single friends, let’s embrace these challenges as ways to strengthen our faith and our source of identity, while also growing in our efforts toward reaching out and taking risks.
Singleness is a time for exploration and pursuit of your passions. So, it’s hard, but it’s also fun. Capitalize on your advantages. The uncertainty of the future found in singleness allow us to be fully present. In the present, the pressure to arrive is smaller, and the freedom to explore is enormous. Since we aren’t responsible for a spouse or children, dive into risk. Change your career, travel more, visit home often, invest in a new hobby, jump into mission; utilize the time to dance and delve into the world and gifts God gave you.
The uncertainty of the future found in singleness allow us to be fully present.
Singleness provides more room for connection beyond “the one.” With the absence of responsibility from marriage or a dating relationship, we have the capacity and freedom to spread our impact, our time, and our energy to more people. Invest in friends, family, or communities to a deeper degree than you might if you get hitched.
Singleness can allow you to experience the true definition of intimacy. Intimacy is more than romance. We are designed for relationship (period!), not necessarily marriage. We can partake in meaningful, sacrificial, integrated relationships in which our hearts are seen and known without ever having to date another person. Find your tribe, prioritize your life around those people, be vulnerable and welcome vulnerability, and life-giving intimacy will flourish.
Singleness can allow you to experience the true definition of intimacy.
Singleness can develop an unconditional confidence. Each success, joyful experience, or word of affirmation as a single person can help us be more confident and resilient. It can help us learn to love ourselves for who we are and how we’re made. Then we can begin to see our presence as a gift to other people.
Start living this beautiful narrative now.
Singleness can be a fulfilling lifestyle. Singleness can be fulfilling… forever. Single years have no less potential than married years, so no need to keep “waiting to find someone”— start living this beautiful narrative now.